Mixed Messages

I am so frustrated right now.

Not about dance, about the medical world.  I just got a call from the scheduler for my hysterectomy and she told me they were currently booking for October.

OCTOBER!

Completely different from the End June timeframe the doctor told me 2 weeks ago.  At least when I explained that, and what I had been told by the doctor, the scheduler agreed to go back to the doctor to see if I should be moved up on the priority list.  Unfortunately, she won’t be able to get back to me with an answer until next week, so I have to spend all weekend wondering if I will have to stay on this medication and keep trying to hold the pieces of my life together until October.

I was having a hard enough time just dealing with having to make it until the end of June, and more likely July.  October is 6 months away.  The doc told me her goal was that I would only have one more injection of the ovarian suppression, and October doesn’t fit with that, I would need 2 more, possibly 3 depending on what part of October we are talking about.

I am trying to remain calm about it, but I am not really succeeding.  At least at home I have some medication to help deal with it.

The only ‘up’ side I can see to October is that I will be able to have my reconstruction revision in July, since the date I was given in June didn’t work.  It’s a very small upside.

I really just want to get both of these surgeries out of the way, so I don’t have to think about them any more, and they can stop interrupting my life.  I feel like my entire life is being scheduled around surgeries right now and until they are done I am just in a holding pattern where nothing I do now will ‘stick’.  I was also told minimum 6-8 weeks off for the hysterectomy, not 4-6.

I keep trying to move forward with my life and feel like I am being constantly knocked back.

Not a great start to the weekend.

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