9 more to go

Finally!! Less than double digits left to go for my radiation.

I cannot wait for radiation to be over, but I am glad that I only have 4 days next week, and then just 5 the week after.

I am finding radiation harder in a lot of ways than chemotherapy.  When I was on chemo, I got a break between treatments, and even if I didn’t want to dance on a certain day, I knew that I would feel better after I danced.

That is not happening with radiation.  I skipped most of practice last night, but I did do practice today. What I am finding though, is that with radiation my motivation, even while I am practicing is really waning.  I practice, but I can’t say I feel better afterward.  In fact, I have a hard time to get through all of my practice, and today after practice I slept for 2 hours right after.

I guess the main thing is that I did get through my practice, even though I didn’t want to, and that it was productive.  I was able to incorporate many of the changes Boss asked me to do during my lessons, so that is a good thing.

We had a small hiccup with the competition, in that one of Boss’s students decided not to go, meaning higher costs for all, but in the end I decided to do it. I need something to focus on this fall too much not to.  It won’t be much of a competition, but it will be something and in the end I miss competing and enjoy competing too much to pass it up.  I am hopeful there will be other students there in my age and level.  I am still waiting to here if medal testing will be possible.

Even with the lack in motivation, I remain optimistic for the next few weeks.  If I have to give myself a break, I will.  If I have to reduce my practice I will.  But I have a strong goal and that is what I am aiming for.

Competitive round practice this weekend.  We will see how that goes.

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